What is the definition of a bully? Someone who, either alone or with the help of others, using actions or words, hurts another person who cannot, because of physical or social reasons, defend herself or himself.

What can I, as an individual, do to stop the bullying in my school? Not laugh at jokes that make fun of other people. Go out of my way to be nice to the person being ostracized.

What can my classmates do as a group to stop bullying in our school? Declare every bully a persona non grata. Everyone wants to be popular. If kids know that teasing or ostracizing a classmate will cause their own popularity to plunge, no one would be willing to pay the social price of picking on others.

A person who bullies isn’t always “the other kid.” Sometimes, it might be… you! Before you say “No way!” think about it. Have you ever heard yourself saying – or thinking – things like:

• Some people deserve to be hurt.
• Being mean to people doesn’t hurt them.
• It is fun to hurt others.
• I’m so cool that kids and adults don’t think I would do anything wrong.
• People push me around, so I’m going to do it to other people, too.
• I feel better about myself when I make other people feel worse.
• If kids are afraid of me, then I won’t get picked on.•
• I am just being funny. What’s the big deal?
• I do what it takes to be part of the “cool” crowd.
• I don’t want to be the only one getting picked on.
• Some kids deserve to be bullied because of what they do to me.
• I don’t like them, so it’s OK to be mean to them.

Do you recognize any of the signs? Kids bully for a lot of reasons. It might be because of:

• Peer pressure
• Being manipulated into something
• Fear
• Insecurity
• Not understanding that their actions hurt someone
• Not having positive adult role models
• Being bullied themselves

If you think this might be you, talk with an adult. Seriously, they can help. If the first adult you talk with isn’t helpful, talk to someone else until you find one who will listen. You have that right!