Motherless Households
6:087 Effects of Growing Up with a Single Parent The
impact of an absent mother Why this can impact us Our mothers are usually the first, and most significant relationship that we have as humans. Not having a mother present in our childhood, or having a relationship that was too damaging to hold on to, can impact on our sense of loss and lead us to feel more vulnerable when becoming a new parent ourselves. For some, our mothers may have been physically absent, while in other cases a mother may have been physically present, but not emotionally available or connected with her children. In either case, as we begin to transform our sense of self and identity into this new role, not having a maternal figure in our lives can increase our feelings of vulnerability and sense of loss, as we evolve into becoming a parent, that is or was, absent in your own life. I was imagining what life would be like as a new mum, and what I would be like as a new mum. This got me thinking about my own mum and what she was like with me, which was pretty sad. Expectant and new parents often describe that moving through the different stages to becoming a parent can lead to feelings of grief resurfacing, as they reflect and wonder how this experience may have been for their own mother. They wonder what their own mother may have done in certain situations, or how their mother felt in this role when they were the infant. For others, it’s about wanting their mother around to share and guide them in their new role. As I looked at my newborn baby in my arms just wished my mum was here to share and guide me. I wondered if mum felt the same way that I did towards me, and what she would say. It made me really miss her. For some, this may lead to feelings of added distress at this life stage. It can also increase the risk of developing anxiety, depression or managing other mental health conditions during pregnancy and in the early years after having a baby. What can help? Understanding the impacts of an absent mother is an important starting point. Connecting and talking to others about how you are feeling can also help. There are professionals who provide
counselling and support to assist parents who may be
struggling in their transition to becoming a parent, due to
the absence of parental figures or other risk factors. Children
Without Mothers Are at Special Risk - 5/1/94 In 1988, the last year for which the Social Security Administration collected such data, 588,000 children under the age of 18 had lost their mothers to death -- a figure that doesn't even begin to include those families where mothers are absent due to divorce, abandonment, alcoholism, mental impairment and imprisonment. Yet because children in single-father households are more likely to be economically secure, and because acknowledging early mother loss makes us all just a little bit uncomfortable at the core, scores of motherless children are overlooked in America every day. I can tell you, based on both personal experience and interviews with hundreds of motherless American women, that losing a mother at an early age is one of the most stressful life events a person can face. It completely rips apart the fabric of a child's life. If a son or daughter who loses a mother never receives adequate substitute mothering, the loss can do long-term damage to his or her self-esteem, ability to relate to other people, overall feelings of security and ability to trust others. Motherless women have also reported sexual abuse by fathers or stepbrothers after their mothers had died, difficulties maintaining relationships as adults, and debilitating post-partum depressions. Just as growing up in poverty has lifelong effects on a child, so does growing up without involved and consistent emotional care. While it has been easy for us to overlook motherless children in recent years, the AIDS epidemic will soon make us unable to ignore their plight. We are headed for both a social and emotional crisis in this respect. In 1983, 255 American children under the age of 18 lost mothers to AIDS; by the year 2000, that figure is likely to surpass 80,000, a 300-fold increase. About one-third of those children will
be New York City residents. Not only will social service
organizations have to provide for the care of thousands of
motherless children, but someone will have to explain to
each one why his or her mother is gone. If we can't do a
better job of preventing and curing the causes of death --
such as AIDS, cancer and accidents -- that take young
mothers away from their children, the least we can do is
begin to acknowledge the difficulties they face. HOPE
EDELMAN New York, April 26, 1994 The writer is the author of
"Motherless Daughters." Psychological
Effects of Growing Up Without a Mother Traditionally, most children have grown with both parents. These figures remained above 85% in most of the US and West Europe till the 1970s. Since then, things started changing quickly. By the year 2000, there was a decline of 17% (with approximately 68% of children growing with both the parents). In most developed nations, only about half of the children now grow up with both the parents, which is a worrisome trend [1]. There are numerous reasons for such a trend, from an increased number of divorces, a decline in family values, job-related issues, to changes in sexual choices. The last few decades have seen the social acceptability of same-sex couples too. Although more children are growing up without a father, those growing up without a mother are also increasing in number. The absence of a father in childhood is a better-studied phenomenon than the absence of the mother. Even shorter separations from a mother could be traumatic Before looking deeper into the negative consequences of growing without mother, it is necessary to understand that even shorter separations like that of a week could be traumatic to a child. Such separations may happen even in same-sex happily living families due to specific reasons like frequent job-related travel. Thus, separation from the mother does not necessarily mean a complete absence of the mother. Even, separation of a week may make a child aggressive, emotionally less stable. Lot also depends on the age of the child. Children are more vulnerable during the first two years when they need close physical proximity to their mother. At this age, children cannot communicate effectively, and mothers are better at understanding the needs of infants. From three years of age to five years, a child is still highly vulnerable but can understand a few things and communicate. After five years of age, children are better at communicating, and thus trauma of separation from a mother can be reduced [2]. Why not having a mother affect a child? Studies show that mothers are unique in providing care during childhood in many ways and better than fathers. Thus, to a degree, they cannot be replaced, and separation can have an impact on the child’s development [3]:
Studies show that both mother and father are equally important for children, as they complement each other. It is something, that is not present in same-sex couples, or when a child is brought up by either a mother or a father. Fathers are good at serving as a role model for growing children, providing them security, and much more. How does not having a mother affect a child? Studies show that prolong absence of a mother may completely alter the emotional responses of the child irreversibly, due to changes in the brain chemicals [4]. Children not having a mother near them grow up emotionally immature and detached. Some of the well-known emotional issues with such children could be [5]:
Some of the lifelong effects of not having a mother may be:
The absence of a mother may gravely affect a child’s emotional and mental health, and a warm caregiver may play an essential role in helping the child and minimizing the trauma. References 1. Lang K, Zagorsky JL. Does Growing up with a Parent Absent Really Hurt? The Journal of Human Resources. 2001;36(2):253-273. doi:10.2307/3069659 2. Howard K, Martin A, Berlin LJ, Brooks-Gunn J. Early Mother-Child Separation, Parenting, and Child Well-Being in Early Head Start Families. Attach Hum Dev. 2011;13(1):5-26. doi:10.1080/14616734.2010.488119 3. Fitzgibbons RP. Growing up with gay parents: What is the big deal?*. Linacre Q. 2015;82(4):332-336. doi:10.1179/0024363915Z.000000000120 4. How Mother-Child Separation Causes Neurobiological Vulnerability Into Adulthood. Association for Psychological Science – APS. Accessed July 27, 2020. [Link] 5.Hill T, MS, NCC, CCTP,
read LL updated: 22 J 2018 ~ 6 min. 7 Consequences of Having
an Emotionally Detached Parent. Psych Central.com. Published
14:52:35-05:00. Accessed July 27, 2020.
[Link] 21
Compelling Motherless Children Statistics - 5/20/17 Almost 30% of custodial fathers receive some form of a support award by the court system when a divorce occurs. In comparison, almost 80% of custodial mothers receive a support order. What does this mean for motherless children? They are either forced to live most of their day without their father because he is earning an income or they are forced by society to live without certain needs or wants simply because a majority of society doesn’t feel the need to enforce support laws equally. Four Fast Facts You Need to Know Right Now 1. 8% of households in the United States are headed by a single father who is raising at least one minor child. 2. Single fathers are more likely to live with a cohabiting partner than single mothers are. 3. Motherless homes are less likely to be living under the poverty line than fatherless homes. 4. 84% of custodial parents are mothers. Takeaway: Homes without moms have some distinct challenges that lie outside of how much money is earned. Although 24% of motherless homes in the United States are below the poverty line, the challenge of a father becoming a nurturing parent is ever present. When you add in the fact that there is a 41% chance of a live-in girlfriend or other partner often having the authority to also raise the children, even without being officially part of the family, there are unique stressors that are placed on motherless children today.
1:06Why Are There Motherless Children Today? 1. 52% of households that don’t have a mother living with her children are divorced, separated, or widowed and living with just the father. 2. Only 7% of homes without a mother are due to a married couple living apart from the spouse. 3. Single fathers who tend to cohabit with another partner tend to be younger, less educated, and less able to earn a livable income. 4. In 1960, 92% of homes were headed by two parent families. Today that percentage is 67%. 5. 18% of single fathers in 2011 were aged 15-29, comprising 27% of the households in this age demographic – more than double some other age demographics. 6. Almost 20% of single fathers have failed to graduate from high school. 7. Only 7% of single fathers have graduated with a college degree in some field. 8. 16% of custodial parents are fathers. Takeaway: Although there will always be tragedies that take mothers away from their families, there is a certain level of decline occurring in homes with two parents. With a drop of 25% in the last four decades, changes in society have happened that have made families drift apart from each other in some way. Whether the statistics are skewed because more fathers are seeking custody of their children or there is a shift in attitudes toward the family in general, the bottom line is this: when there isn’t a mother in the home, there is less overall income, more poverty-related issues, and less stability for the children. What Increases the Chance? 1. 29% of households that have a single father as the head of the household are African-American. 2. 20% of Hispanic households are headed by a single father. In comparison, just 14% of Caucasian households are headed by a single father. 3. There is a direct link in the level of education a father has to an increased risk of having motherless children. Takeaway: Motherless homes happen for a variety of reasons around the world, but it seems to be happening in a much more prevalent way today. This is especially so for minority populations and this puts the children at a very high risk of developing low levels of self esteem. If a mother chooses to leave, then the natural thought of the child is that the mother doesn’t love them. This creates confusion and then guilt because the children believe it is their fault that their mother has left. What Happens in Motherless Homes? 1. Children that come from motherless homes have difficulties developing bonds with other adults besides the father. 2. There is an increased level of fear and anxiety that is present with children from motherless homes because they are scared that other adults will also leave. 3. There is a two-fold grieving process for children in motherless homes because the lost relationship is missed and then any hope of a reunion with the mother is then abandoned as well. 4. Children who come from motherless homes have a higher risk of isolation because they are uncomfortable around other children who speak about their mothers. 5. There is an increased risk of future abuse and abandonment occurring at the hands of children who come from motherless homes. 6. Homes can be motherless even when a mother is still present in the home because there can be psychological issues with the mother at play that cause the same effects of abandonment as actual abandonment does. Takeaway: Fathers are
encouraged to step up and become mentors to children in
fatherless homes, but there isn’t an equal push for
mothers to do the same thing. Why is this? Because of the
social stigmas that would be brought to light if society was
made aware of the issues that motherless children face?
There are too many risks associated with motherless
children, from an inferior quality of life to a continuation
of the cycle of abuse, to allow these issues to continue.
Children benefit from having a mother in the home and
although this can’t be had sometimes because of
tragedy, the fact remains that a strong mother figure does a
child a lot of good. How
many kids grow up without a mother? How many kids grow up without parents? Across America, there are approximately 18.3 million children who live without a father in the home, comprising about 1 in 4 US children (Father Absence Statistics). The United States has the highest rate of children living in single-parent households of any nation in the world (Kramer, 2021). What are the statistics of motherless homes? Why Are There Motherless Children Today? 52% of households that don't have a mother living with her children are divorced, separated, or widowed and living with just the father. Only 7% of homes without a mother are due to a married couple living apart from the spouse. Does not having a mother affect a child? This means irritability, low self-esteem, depression, anxiety, lack of motivation and more. Health issues. Faced with the loss or absence of their mother, some children may lose their appetite. Coupled with the emotional issues described above, this can lead to problems with the child's physical health. What is a child without a mother called? An orphan is a child whose parents have died. You can also say that a child is orphaned. She's an orphan adopted by a wealthy New York family. She finds herself caring for an orphaned child. You can also say that a child with no mother is motherless, and a child with no father is fatherless. Why do children need their mothers? A mother's physical and emotional presence provides babies with two things: protection from stress and emotional regulation, both of which are important to healthy brain development and the child's future well-being. What is true of children with absent mothers? The results show that parental absence is negatively associated with the development of left-behind children. Left-behind children have a lower cognitive test score and academic test score, and they are also less likely to attend a college. Does a child need a mother figure? Having a motherly figure in your child's life, which can pertain to not only a mom, but can be a grandma, aunt, etc., can significantly influence a child's growth and development. Women have an essential role to play when it comes to boosting a child's development. What is cold mother syndrome? Emotionally absent or cold mothers can be unresponsive to their children's needs. They may act distracted and uninterested during interactions, or they could actively reject any attempts of the child to get close. They may continue acting this way with adult children. Does growing up without a mother affect you? There are definite psychological effects of growing up without a mother. Absent parents leave long-term imprints on growing children that can affect relationships, education, and many other aspects of life. This is more evident when children grow up without a mother. How does not having a mother affect you? Children who have an absent mother develop certain typical behaviors towards her: protesting, desperation, and distancing. Her being gone doesn't make them feel more affection; it makes their emotions go wild. In the end, their only choice is to block their feelings of love. What do mommy issues look like in a girl? Mommy issues in women Low self-esteem. Difficulty trusting others/commitment issues. Having very few female friends. Feeling like you must do everything perfectly. Are people happier with no kids? A study from Princeton University and Stony Brook University found that parents and nonparents have similar levels of life satisfaction, but parents experienced both more daily joy and more daily stress than nonparents. “Life without children is simply much more stable,” Glass says. Is a child more of the mother or father? The egg and sperm together give the baby the full set of chromosomes. So, half the baby's DNA comes from the mother and half comes from the father. How many children live with a single-parent? Family nativity makes a difference: 38% of kids in U.S.-born families live in a single-parent household compared to just 24% of kids in immigrant families. Do kids really need both parents? University studies have shown that having both parents actively involved in a child's life can provide significant social, psychological, and health benefits, and the stability of having a relationship with both parents can provide greater opportunities for children to find their own paths to success. What is the hardest baby age? But many first-time parents find that after the first month of parenthood, it can actually get more difficult. This surprising truth is one reason many experts refer to a baby's first three months of life as the “fourth trimester.” If months two, three, and beyond are tougher than you expected, you're not alone. Why having a mother is important? Mothers play a critical role in the family, which is a powerful force for social cohesion and integration. The mother-child relationship is vital for the healthy development of children. And mothers are not only caregivers; they are also breadwinners for their families. What is the main cause of lone motherhood? The breaking up of nuclear families due to separation, divorce, or the death of one spouse, creates lone-parent families. There has been a gradual rise in the number of divorces in the West. Families with children often break into lone-parent families after divorces. How does mother abandonment affect a child? A child who was abandoned by a parent or caregiver may have mood swings or anger later in life. These behaviors can alienate potential intimate partners and friends. A child's self-esteem can also be affected by lack of parental support. Abandonment fears can impair a person's ability to trust others. What are signs of a toxic mother? Signs you might have a toxic parent include:
What are daddy issues for a woman? “Daddy issues” is generally a catchall phrase, often used disparagingly to refer to women who have complex, confusing, or dysfunctional relationships with men. It can describe people (most often women) who project subconscious impulses toward the male partners in their life. Are mommy issues a red flag? A boy with mommy issues may reject his partner when she comes to what he considers to be too close. An avoidant attachment style, fear of intimacy and stonewalling are also common problems for a boy with mommy issues. Spotting these red flags, in the beginning, is essential to making healthy relationship decisions. What are signs of daddy issues in females?
Source: www.thehealthyjournal.com/frequently-asked-questions/how-many-kids-grow-up-without-a-mother The Effects of Being Motherless - 4/16/19 “A mother’s arms are more comforting than anyone else’s.”– Princess Diana A One of a Kind Bond There is nothing like the closeness of a bond between a mother and her child. One of the most obvious reasons involves the fact that a mother carries her baby inside of her body for months! Talk about close. At some point during the pregnancy, the fetus may begin to hear his or her mother’s heartbeat and/or voice. Experiences such as looking at the ultrasound scan or feeling the fetus move for the first time typically may lead to the mother feeling more attached to her unborn baby. If a mother chooses to breastfeed her baby, this is also another opportunity to develop a stronger, tight-knit bond. Motherless Mother’s may be absent from their child’s life for a few different reasons including:
Adoption A child who has been given up for adoption may develop a desire to know and understand why. When a mother has to make the decision of giving her baby up for adoption possible reasons may include:
Maternal Bond and Adoption Biologically speaking, the maternal bond between a mother and her baby normally develops during the pregnancy months. Is the maternal bond still a possibility in cases where a mother adopts a child? Because there is no definite answer, this is a tough question. It is best to say that it is based on individual situations. Every mother and adopted child will bond differently dependent upon their environments. Although the relationship lacks the biological benefits in terms of creating a bond, it is still possible to develop a connection between a mother and her adopted child. Child’s Mental Development A child’s mental and emotional development begins as early as they are born. From the minute they take their first breath, an infant will begin to utilize their senses and begin to figure out the world surrounding them. With time, the child begins to develop all of the following:
A child’s biological makeup creates part of who they are, but their environment aids in creating the other part of themselves. The influence or absence of a mother can greatly affect a child’s mental health development. Mental Health when Motherless An individual’s mental health may be affected at any age or circumstance due to the lack of a mother. Different situations and causes, as listed below, can provoke different effects…
How to Help Depending on your specific situation, here are some tips and tricks to help make it through!
Resources: https://youaremom.com/children/absent-mother-affects-children/ Source: www.claritychi.com/the-effects-of-being-motherless/ Number
of Children Living Only With Their Mothers Has Doubled in
Past 50 Years - 4/12/21 The number of children living with two parents has dropped since 1968, while the percentage living with their mother only has doubled. In 1968, 85% of children under 18 lived with two parents (regardless of marital status); by 2020, 70% did, according to the Census Bureau’s Current Population Survey (CPS). Children living with a mother only is the second most common U.S. living arrangement, a number that has doubled since 1968. Monitoring these trends is important because children’s living arrangements can have implications for children’s outcomes, such as academic achievements, internalizing problems (e.g.depression and anxiety), and externalizing problems (e.g., anger and aggression). Since 2007, the CPS has specifically asked respondents to identify two parents for the child if both live in the household. If one parent is deployed overseas at the time of interview, for example, children are shown as living with one parent. The same goes for separated or divorced parents sharing custody: The parent the child is living with during the interview would be the identified parent. Prior to 2007, respondents could report the presence of one parent only and children were only shown as living with two parents when the parent was married. If the parent was not married, children were not identified as living with two parents. Living With Two Parents Living with two parents has historically been the nation’s most common children’s living arrangement. In 1968, about 60.0 million (85%) U.S. children under 18 lived with two parents. But this number dipped between 1968 and 2020 when both the percentage and overall number of children living with two parents declined. By 2020, although this living arrangement continued to be the most common for children, the number of children living with two parents had slipped to 51.3 million (70%). Living With Mother Only Children living with a mother only is the second most common U.S. living arrangement, a number that has doubled since 1968. About 7.6 million (11%) children lived with their mother only in 1968 compared to 15.3 million (21%) in 2020. Living With Father Only The number of children living with their father only, although still small, more than quadrupled from 0.8 million (1%) to 3.3 million (4.5%) between 1968 and 2020. This arrangement remains much less common than living with a mother only. Living With No Parent Perhaps unsurprisingly, living with no parent but with grandparents or other relatives, for example, is the least common living arrangement for children. In 1968, approximately 2.0 million (3%) children lived with no parent. In 2020, that estimate rose to approximately 3.0 million (4%). Among those living without a parent, more than half (55%) had a grandparent in the household. Age of Children The age profile of children living in specific living arrangements varies. For example, the share of children ages 0 to 5, 6 to 11, and 12 to 17 living with two married parents did not differ significantly in 2020. However, more than half of children living with two unmarried parents were between the ages of 0 and 5. Children living with one parent or no parent were older, more often ages 12 to 17 than 0 to 5 years. Differences Among Race and Origin Groups Living with two married parents was the most common living arrangement for children of all race and origin groups other than Black children. Fewer than two-fifths of Black children were living with two married parents in 2020. These children were most likely to live with their mothers only, with nearly half living in this arrangement in 2020. Asian children were the most likely to live with two married parents, followed by White, non-Hispanic children and Hispanic children. Other highlights:
The America’s Families and Living Arrangements tables and figures also provide details about unmarried couples, family groups, household sizes and other living arrangements. More information on confidentiality protection, sampling error, nonsampling error and definitions is available on the CPS technical documentation page. Paul Hemez and Chanell Washington are survey statisticians in the Census Bureau’s Fertility and Family Statistics Branch. The majority of America’s 72.6M
children under 18 live with two parents (70%). The second
most common are children living with mother only (22%). Data
on Single Parent vs. Dual Parent Households -
10/30/14 Economic Differences Pew Research Center, an American think tank organization specializing in social and demographic trends, revealed that in 2011 all households with children reported an average yearly income of $57,100. Single mothers who were divorced, separated or widowed earned an average yearly income of $29,000. The median family income for single mothers who had never been married in 2011 was $17,400, just slightly above poverty level. These statistics show that single parents are more susceptible to financial hardship than families with two parents contributing an income. Other statistics from the Witherspoon Institute, a conservative think tank in Princeton, New Jersey, demonstrate that 66 percent of children from single-parent households live below the poverty level and nearly 50 percent of adults who receive welfare began the program after becoming a single parent. Only about 10 percent of children raised in a two-parent family live below the poverty level. Social, Cognitive and Psychological Implications Studies conducted by Dr. Paul Amato, Professor of Family Sociology and Demography at Pennsylvania State University show that children who grow up with both biological parents in the same household are less likely to experience a variety of cognitive, emotional and social problems. Dual-parent households often maintain higher standards of living, therefore providing more effective parenting skills with less stressful life circumstances. Examining potential advantages of a single-parent household is also beneficial. Leaving a relationship that exposes your child to marital conflict is a positive change because your child will no longer be entangled in parental discord at home. The focus of homelife shifts to the parent-child relationship and daily activities can be more structured around the child. Children of single parents are likely to develop skills of independence, responsibility and self-sufficiency at an early age. Long-Term Effects Research conducted by Sara McLanahan, Associate Professor of Sociology at the University of Wisconsin-Madison posits specific long-term outcomes for children of single-parent households. Her studies reflect that a high percentage of single mothers never graduate from high school and that this increases the chances of their children not graduating from high school by 10 percent. Exposure to single parenthood as a child also raises the probability of next generation single parenthood by approximately 120 percent. McLanahan's research testifies that daughters of single parents are 30 to 53 percent more likely to marry as teenagers, 75 to 111 percent more likely to give birth while teenagers and are more likely to experience marital severance and have babies out of wedlock. These statistics may reflect the result of single-parenting disadvantages such as less supervisory methods utilized during adolescent years and reduced ability for effective disciplining. Importance of Homelife While much of the research conducted on single-parent and dual-parent households points to the disadvantages of single-parent families, there is extreme relevance in emphasizing the value of a secure, consistent, loving homelife to a child's upbringing. Single parents and dual parents alike have the ability to create a homelife for their child that provides stability, emotional support and dependability. Further studies conducted by Dr. Paul Amato along with Frieda Fowler, Department of Sociology at University of Nebraska-Lincoln, demonstrate that positive parenting techniques -- regardless of family structure, income level or diversity -- directly correlate to a favorable outcome for a child's development and success later in life. Any parenting model, whether it's single parent, biological dual parent, stepparent or cross-generational has the capacity to incorporate positive parenting methods such as understanding developmental needs, talking and listening, modeling respect, encouragement and participation. What are the components of Family Dynamics? 4/18/17 Family dynamics refers to the forces at work within the family, the interaction between family members, along with the resultant behaviors. Families may or may not be biologically related, and family, in this context, refers to all persons that live within a household, as well as biological family members who may live outside the household. There are a multitude of factors which are related to family dynamics, including the structure of the family itself, the income level of the family, the attitude towards education and spirituality that permeates the family, the number of siblings and their interactions with each other, and so on. Family Structure While the nuclear family, consisting of a father, mother and children, still predominate society in the United States and other the world, there are a wide variety of family situations including approximately 21 percent single-mother families and 5 percent single father families in the United States. Additionally, families can consist of married and non-married couples without children, children raised by grandparents or extended family, step-parents or non-married heterosexual couples, as well as married or non-married homosexual couples. Additionally, some children are raised by siblings, and some are in a temporary foster care family arrangement. The particular structure of the family affects relationships between couples, and has an influence in the relationships between a child and his parents or caregivers, a child with his siblings, and behavioral outcomes. Love and Nurturing Love binds a child to parents or to the caregiver. Love is an essential element in healthy family dynamics. The book "Sociology in a Changing World" by William Kornblum of the City University of New York, states that a lack of parental attention can result in emotional problems and even, in extreme cases, early death 1? This is a verified and trusted source "Sociology in a Changing World"; William Kornblum; 2008 Studies indicate that nurturance and parental love play "an important role in the development of the individual." Single Parent Families Single parent mothers or fathers may rely more upon grandparents for support and caregiving. Children, then, may be more attached to grandparents than children who are raised in a family with both parents. Conversely, grandparents can sometimes be resentful of added burdens placed on them, and this can be reflected in the way they interact with their grandchildren. While single parent families may have additional stresses than nuclear families, successfully raising children and healthy family interactions are attainable. Income Level While a high income is not a necessity for healthy family dynamics, income level can affect family dynamics. 60 percent of single mothers live below the poverty line in the United States. Dependence on government assistance, as well as the struggle to maintain daily needs, can affect a parent's view of themselves and their view and attitude towards the child. A high income level, however, does not ensure positive dynamics, but income level is only one factor among many that can have a bearing on family dynamics. Parenting Style Kimberly Kopko an associate of the Department of Policy Analysis and Management at Cornell University, describes four typical parenting styles: authoritative, firm but loving parenting; authoritarian, a somewhat dictatorial method of parenting; permissive, which is described as warm but undemanding and uninvolved parents. Parental warmth and responsiveness are also factors in family dynamics. Authoritative parenting is considered the most successful parenting style. How Does Family Structure Impact Language Development? - 9/26/17 Learning how to communicate clearly is an essential life skill, so it is important to understand what factors affect language development in children 3. Being aware of the ways in which family structure can influence a child's language development allows parents to better help their children develop the skills they will need to succeed in school and in life 3. Family Income According to a 2009 American Psychological Association article entitled "The Effects of Socioeconomic Status, Race, and Parenting on Language Development in Early Childhood," socioeconomic status is significantly correlated with language ability in children at 36 months 3. Children of low income parents are most likely to have language difficulties, while children of upper income parents are more likely to have above average verbal skills. Children in Day Care According to the National Institutes of Health, children who were enrolled in child care centers as infants and toddlers had above average language and social skills when entering kindergarten. However, it should be noted that the study also found parental involvement in a child's education was two to three times more important than the child's experience in a day care setting. Presence of Siblings in the Home It is common for parents to assume that having siblings to talk to provides a beneficial effect for a child's language development 3. However, a 1990 study from the University of Iowa found that birth order does not significantly influence a child's language development 3. First born or only children, middle children and youngest children were equally represented among the study group of children suffering from language impairments. Single Parent Homes The Human Early Learning Partnership found that preschoolers from single parent households had lower verbal reasoning skills than children from two parent homes 1. The site also reports that elementary school children from single parent homes are 27 percent more likely to be placed in special education classes at school. The exact reason for this is unknown, however. The children of single mothers are more likely to have other risk factors for language difficulties, such as living in poverty. It can be hard to separate the influence of all of these interconnected factors. Parental Involvement Living in a home with parents who
value reading and writing has the greatest positive effect
on a child's language development 3. According to Preparing
for Life, it is best to practice dialogic reading with young
children 3. This approach involves asking the child
questions about the book to make him an active participant
in the story instead of having him listen passively while an
adult is reading. Parents who practice dialogic reading with
their children encourage them to build their vocabulary and
practice their critical thinking skills. Parents with higher
incomes and greater education levels are more likely to
naturally engage in this type of interaction with their
children, but this technique is something that all parents
can easily do. The Number of
Children Being Raised by Gay or Lesbian Parents Gender
Development of Boys Without Their Mothers - 10/30/14 A Mother's Importance The mother is usually the first woman that a little boy loves and wholly cares about. Instantly this links a mother’s absence to possible problems with relating later on in life. Potentially, the lack of a mother figure could lead to a string of failed relationships and a higher chance of the child ending up alone. In his article on a world without mothers, Ph.D and Child Psychologist Kenneth Condrell says that much like a steady girlfriend or a wife, the mother acts as the boy’s companion and his encouragement until he is old enough to move on. As far as gender goes, boys who share a strong relationship with their mothers usually end up softer and more compassionate with the women in their lives, but never less manly. Growing up Motherless When a boy grows up without a mother, he often lacks the female influence which becomes essential later on in life. Mothers rarely emasculate their sons; they simply aid them in gaining a security around women, the masculine quality of looking after and taking care of the women in their lives. For the same reason, boys without mothers rarely end up more masculine, just less able to relate to the opposite sex. As you can imagine, this could end up as quite the problem, resulting in higher levels of aggression and less ability to confidently enter social situations. The Father's Role While a motherless child will always find his situation tougher than normal, the father can play a big part in making the single father experience a lot easier. One of the most important things that a motherless household lacks is affection. A mother’s love helps any boy build up his confidence and become more able to explore other situations and connect with other people. For this reason, it’s important that a single father provides his son with loving physical contact, as well as the necessary “I love you” and “I’m here for you.” This affection, though more common from the mother, does not have a feminizing effect on the boy. It simply raises his self-esteem. Ways to Keep a Mother's Presence in the Household The father should avoid cutting off any of his former wife’s relatives, as often times, those related to the mother (aunts, cousins) may be able to provide the boy with some of that much-needed motherly love and influence. A mother should not be pushed aside, even if she isn’t around anymore. Single fathers should keep talking about the mother, constantly reminding the little boy where he came from. Drawing from the advice William Pollack, Ph.D gives in his book "Real Boys' Voices," the emotional support, safety and confidence to explore the world that a boy's mother provides all have little to do with gender development--just healthy development. Boys are encouraged to explore the opposite sex, rather than hide from the opposite sex. The Effects of Fathers Not Paying Attention to Daughters - 9/26/17 Whether a father always puts himself first, is obsessed with his career or is simply absent, daughters can feel the effects of not receiving their dad’s attention long into their adult years. Sometimes a father can be intimidated by the roller-coaster emotions of his daughter and withdraws from her to avoid being caught in the torrent of yelling, tears and frustration. While a father’s love guides a girl to see herself as valuable and special, his lack of attention can be deflating. Emotional Scars A daughter who longs to receive attention from her father and seems to always come up short can feel like she needs to perform better to merit his consideration. This performance shows itself in arenas such as setting higher standards and goals and improving physical appearance. A daughter can think “Maybe if I look and act right, he will like me more." She may never feel like she is good enough for her dad. A study conducted in 1992 by Draper and Harpending published in the Journal of Anthropological Research shows that absent fathers place daughters at risk for early sexual activity and teenage pregnancy 3 This is a verified and trusted source National Institutes of Health: Does Father Absence Place Daughters at Special Risk for Early Sexual Activity and Teenage Pregnancy? Vulnerability and Anxiety Another effect that daughters can feel when they do not receive sufficient attention from their fathers is never feeling satisfied in their relationship with their dad. Girls with siblings might feel a need to compete for their father’s attention, as if there is only a limited quantity to go around. A father's lack of encouragement can leave a young woman wondering if her boyfriend will leave her, if she weighs too much or if she should withdraw from making commitments to avoid letting others down. Learning How to Relate to Dad In order for daughters to grow in relationships with their fathers, it is imperative that they learn to relate to their fathers differently, according to Psychology Today 2 This is a verified and trusted source Psychology Today: Father’s Day: Dads and Their Teen Daughters Some important steps include arranging counseling for your child, helping her accept her father’s limitations and teaching her to protect herself emotionally. Lowering expectations can also help daughters better relate to a dad who does not give his attention. Relating to Others When a girl’s father is not paying attention to her, it is helpful to build healthy relationships with other male adults. Grandfathers, uncles and ministers are typically excellent sources who can appreciate, encourage and build a girl’s self-esteem. These men can participate in special events, offer words of advice and simply express the girl’s value as a person. Seeing that healthy relationships are mutually encouraging can teach the slighted daughter that she is already perfect the way she is and that she should not have to work to receive attention. The Psychology of the Mother-Son Relationship - 9/26/17 The psychology of the mother-son relationship has been studied and discussed since around 440 B.C. when Sophocles wrote about Oedipus Rex, a man who killed his father and slept with his mother. Perhaps no modern psychoanalyst displayed as much interest in that scenario as Sigmund Freud, who developed the theory of the Oedipal Complex where boys between the ages of 3 and 5 would desire their mothers and subconsciously would want their fathers out of the picture so they could take that role. Most people have discounted Freud’s theory as having no merit, but plenty of other factors go into the mother-son relationship. Mother-Son Bonding Research reported in 2010 by the University of Reading reveals that all children, particularly boys, who don’t have a strong bond with their mothers have more behavioral problems. Kate Stone Lombardi, author of “The Mama’s Boy Myth: Why Keeping Our Sons Close Makes Them Stronger,” said in Telegram.com that boys who don’t have a strong bond with their mothers from their earliest days grow up to be hostile, aggressive and destructive. Boys who have a close bond with their moms tend to avoid future delinquent behavior. Attachment Theory Attachment theory states that children who have a strong attachment to their parents feel supported and comforted by their parents. But children who are rejected or who receive care and comfort inconsistently tend to develop behavioral problems. Analysis by Dr. Pasco Fearon of the School of Psychology and Clinical Language Science at the University of Reading confirmed that attachment theory has validity after looking at 69 studies that involved about 6,000 children. Too Much Mothering Many people believe that too much mothering produces soft, sissy boys. Jerry Seinfeld once said on the TV show “Seinfeld”: “Not that there’s anything wrong with that.” Although what he really meant was that, yes, many people do believe there is something wrong with that. Peggy Drexler, research psychologist and author of “Raising Boys Without Men,” pointed out in a “Psychology Today” article that society says it’s OK for a girl to be a “Daddy’s girl,” but it’s not OK for a boy to be a “Momma’s boy.” The idea of a loving mother raising a soft boy, however, is just a myth. Drexler says that mothers should be a “safe harbor” for their boys but that they should also “demand independence.” She stressed that, above all, a mother’s love can never hurt. Good Communicator and Mate Moms who are close with their sons tend to raise boys who are better able to communicate their feelings and who can stand up to peer pressure, according to Lombardi. As the son reaches manhood, if he enjoyed a loving, respectful relationship with his mother, he is more likely to treat his future significant other the same way, says Lombardi 3 This is a verified and trusted source. Telegram.com: 5 Reasons the Mother-Son Relationship is So Important. This foundation can lead to a successful love relationship. The Effects of Single Parents on Boys - 7/23/13 Single parents have a unique position in their children’s lives because they have to play the role of both mother and father in situations where the other parent has passed away, is divorced, has neglected the child, or never was involved in the child’s life. Researchers have found that when kids grow up in single-parent homes, boys are affected more adversely than girls -- especially when the available parent is the mother, according to the report, “Wayward Sons: The Emerging Gender Gap in Labor Markets and Education,” published on the Third Way Organization website. The sons of single parents may experience financial, emotional, social and psychological issues. Financial The single parent is the sole provider for the home, and boys growing up in such families experience higher incidences of poverty. A 2012 study of single parenthood in the United States and 16 other high-income countries, found that U.S. single parents are the worst off of these countries because single parents are given little support for balancing job and care-giving responsibilities, according to the New York Times article, “Single Parents: Unsupported and Feeling The Blame.” The single parent has to work long hours, and still the income may not be enough to meet the needs of the family. As a result, single parents may not be in a position to make available the education and economic opportunities their sons need to get ahead. Social Boys in single-parent homes may suffer from social challenges because these homes lack the well-rounded development that intact families enjoy. Single mothers are not as adept at rearing boys as they are in raising girls because they cannot teach boys how to become a man. Single mothers may also invest less time and emotion in their sons than in their daughters, causing the boys to misbehave and act out -- especially in school. Boys exhibit at-risk behaviors such as getting low grades, skipping school or dropping out, and they often refuse to attend college or make choices that could affect their ability for greater economic opportunities in the future. The study found that boys in single-parent homes would benefit from greater parental input and from having a greater number of positive home influences. Emotional Emotional effects are also associated with fatherless boys. Mothers head a significant number of single-parent homes, and in spite of mothers’ efforts to be present for their sons, boys might feel incomplete, alone and that they lack a strong sense of identity. The need to belong might push them to join a group to get a sense of identity; in many cases, boys are more likely to be influenced toward substance abuse, truancy and crime. A single mother needs to be compassionate, patient, supportive and actively involved in seeking out activities and role models for her son to help him cope with the feelings of anger, alienation, vulnerability and confusion he might experience. Single fathers also need to be empathic and try to understand and comfort their sons to mitigate the absence of their mothers. Psychological The sons of single parents are more likely to be predisposed toward psychological disturbances. The largest study to date on the mental state of single-parent children, published in The Lancet in 2003, Swedish researchers found that children of single parents and, boys in particular, are at greater risk of suffering mental hardships because they have to adjust to their reality, which is different from that of children in two-parent households. The children need to learn to cope but the study shows that they are sometimes unable to cope, because of situational stress and that they tend more toward depression, addiction, suicidal tendencies and low self-esteem. While this may sometimes be the case, nine out of 10 teens from single-parent homes do not suffer psychological problems serious enough for hospitalization, and that better-quality parenting alleviates the problem, CBS News reports. Characteristics of a Daddy's Girl - 9/26/17 Some women recall their childhood relationships with fathers as incredibly positive, which is a characteristic of a “daddy’s girl.” Having a positive relationship with a father can help women identify desirable masculine traits, such as directness or being career-driven, according to a 2012 Huffington Post article titled, “The Dark Side of Being Daddy's Little Girl.” On the positive side, daddy’s girls characteristically feel a sense of security or pride when a father’s approval is extended. Being a daddy’s girl can have the negative effect of lost confidence in self-efficacy or personal intelligence, however. Mother Figure Running into problems with a mother figure can be another characteristic of daddy’s girls. Although daughters enjoy a close relationship with fathers, this can create tension with a mother who feels left out or unimportant in comparison, according to a 2011 "Psychology Today" article titled, “Father-Daughter Bond Enjoys a Growth Spurt.” Mothers might not have found a healthy way to adjust to fathers playing a key role in the family dynamic 2 This is a verified and trusted source. Psychology Today: Father-Daughter Bond Enjoys a Growth Spurt However, mothers can remind themselves that daughters stand to benefit from positive interactions with fathers. Close relationships with dads can give daughters confidence in matters including sports, careers, finance and character development. Masculine Approval Daughters who basked in the approval of their fathers might develop a habit of seeking masculine approval later in life, according to a 2010 article on the Dialectical Psychology website titled, “Daddy’s Girls -- Women with a Positive Father Complex.” Although daddy’s girls might feel comfortable and confident in the company of men, this could be closely tied to their feelings of acceptance and approval-seeking. This can lead to potentially dependent or unhealthy relationships with men. Dating Issues Dating issues sometimes emerge when daughters struggled with unhealthy relationships with fathers during childhood, according to a 2012 Marie Claire article titled, “Not Daddy’s Little Girl.” When fathers aren’t present during childhood, this can lead to feelings of betrayal or abandonment 1 This is a verified and trusted source. Marie Claire: Daddy Issues and Dating Passivity or resentment can create problems in subsequent romantic relationships. If you’re suffering negative consequences of being or not being a “daddy’s girl,” reflecting on a father’s personal accountability for his choices can help draw a distinction between his life and your life. Embracing positive factors in your current circumstances can help release negative experiences from the past. Mate Selection According to the Science 20.com article, “Sexual Imprinting: Are You A Daddy's Girl?” daughters with strong positive relationships with fathers during childhood are more likely to select mates resembling their dads 3 This is a verified and trusted source. Science 20.com: Sexual Imprinting: Are You a Daddy's Girl? .In contrast, daughters who were not “daddy’s girls” selected mates who resembled their fathers to a lesser extent. Effects of Favoritism on Stepchildren - 9/20/17 Some element of favoritism occurs in just about every family, even if it's just the extra attention parents usually give a new baby or a sick child. Blended families face extra complications, including the possibility of tensions between stepparents and stepchildren. When one child is favored over the others, the well-being of the whole family can suffer. Favoritism Favoritism is not restricted to blended families. Parents can favor one child over another for many reasons, including gender, behavior, personality and personal interests. Stepparents often favor their biological children over their stepchildren. According to an article in "Psychology Today," favoritism can cause problems with depression, lack of self-esteem and lack of self-confidence later in a child's life 1 This is a verified and trusted source. Psychology Today: When Parents Play Favorites Blended Families In a blended family, it's not realistic to expect the stepparent and stepchildren to be close to each other right away. For instance, a stepmother is not going to feel the same immediate, unconditional sense of love for her stepchildren that she feels for her own children. Expecting either the stepparent or the stepchildren to automatically have deep feelings for each other would only put a lot of pressure on everyone involved. However, an ongoing attitude of favoritism is a different matter. Consequences Some stepparents never emotionally connect with their stepchildren and might even view them with resentment, jealousy or hostility. If the child's stepparent and biological parent have a child together, both parents might favor the new child they have in common over the child from a previous relationship. This can cause long-term problems for the child who is less favored, including higher levels of aggression and poor performance in school, according to PsychologyToday.com. Sibling Relationships The relationships between step-siblings and half-siblings can also be damaged by parental favoritism. The siblings might compete with each other for the affection of both parents, or they might each maintain closer ties to their own half of the family without ever really blending. In this circumstance the step-siblings might never develop a close relationship with each other and might have little connection as adults. According to an article by psychologist Ellen Libby at the HuffingtonPost.com, the best way for families to overcome this type of problem is to communicate openly and honestly with each other about their feelings and difficulties. What Are the Components of Family Dynamics? 4/18/17 Family dynamics refers to the forces at work within the family, the interaction between family members, along with the resultant behaviors. Families may or may not be biologically related, and family, in this context, refers to all persons that live within a household, as well as biological family members who may live outside the household. There are a multitude of factors which are related to family dynamics, including the structure of the family itself, the income level of the family, the attitude towards education and spirituality that permeates the family, the number of siblings and their interactions with each other, and so on. Family Structure While the nuclear family, consisting of a father, mother and children, still predominate society in the United States and other the world, there are a wide variety of family situations including approximately 21 percent single-mother families and 5 percent single father families in the United States. Additionally, families can consist of married and non-married couples without children, children raised by grandparents or extended family, step-parents or non-married heterosexual couples, as well as married or non-married homosexual couples. Additionally, some children are raised by siblings, and some are in a temporary foster care family arrangement. The particular structure of the family affects relationships between couples, and has an influence in the relationships between a child and his parents or caregivers, a child with his siblings, and behavioral outcomes. Love and Nurturing Love binds a child to parents or to the caregiver. Love is an essential element in healthy family dynamics. The book "Sociology in a Changing World" by William Kornblum of the City University of New York, states that a lack of parental attention can result in emotional problems and even, in extreme cases, early death 1 This is a verified and trusted source "Sociology in a Changing World"; William Kornblum; 2008 Studies indicate that nurturance and parental love play "an important role in the development of the individual." Single Parent Families Single parent mothers or fathers may rely more upon grandparents for support and caregiving. Children, then, may be more attached to grandparents than children who are raised in a family with both parents. Conversely, grandparents can sometimes be resentful of added burdens placed on them, and this can be reflected in the way they interact with their grandchildren. While single parent families may have additional stresses than nuclear families, successfully raising children and healthy family interactions are attainable. Income Level While a high income is not a necessity for healthy family dynamics, income level can affect family dynamics. 60 percent of single mothers live below the poverty line in the United States. Dependence on government assistance, as well as the struggle to maintain daily needs, can affect a parent's view of themselves and their view and attitude towards the child. A high income level, however, does not ensure positive dynamics, but income level is only one factor among many that can have a bearing on family dynamics. Parenting Style Kimberly Kopko an associate of the Department of Policy Analysis and Management at Cornell University, describes four typical parenting styles: authoritative, firm but loving parenting; authoritarian, a somewhat dictatorial method of parenting; permissive, which is described as warm but undemanding and uninvolved parents. Parental warmth and responsiveness are also factors in family dynamics. Authoritative parenting is considered the most successful parenting style. Data on Single Parent vs. Dual Parent Households - 10/30/14 Preparing to embark upon the journey of single parenthood poses many questions and concerns. Exploring the differences between single-parent and dual-parent households can arm you with helpful information to establish a successful homelife and a positive relationship with your child, regardless of whether you are parenting independently or with a partner. Economic Differences Pew Research Center, an American think tank organization specializing in social and demographic trends, revealed that in 2011 all households with children reported an average yearly income of $57,100. Single mothers who were divorced, separated or widowed earned an average yearly income of $29,000. The median family income for single mothers who had never been married in 2011 was $17,400, just slightly above poverty level. These statistics show that single parents are more susceptible to financial hardship than families with two parents contributing an income. Other statistics from the Witherspoon Institute, a conservative think tank in Princeton, New Jersey, demonstrate that 66 percent of children from single-parent households live below the poverty level and nearly 50 percent of adults who receive welfare began the program after becoming a single parent. Only about 10 percent of children raised in a two-parent family live below the poverty level. Social, Cognitive and Psychological Implications Studies conducted by Dr. Paul Amato, Professor of Family Sociology and Demography at Pennsylvania State University show that children who grow up with both biological parents in the same household are less likely to experience a variety of cognitive, emotional and social problems. Dual-parent households often maintain higher standards of living, therefore providing more effective parenting skills with less stressful life circumstances. Examining potential advantages of a single-parent household is also beneficial. Leaving a relationship that exposes your child to marital conflict is a positive change because your child will no longer be entangled in parental discord at home. The focus of homelife shifts to the parent-child relationship and daily activities can be more structured around the child. Children of single parents are likely to develop skills of independence, responsibility and self-sufficiency at an early age. Long-Term Effects Research conducted by Sara McLanahan, Associate Professor of Sociology at the University of Wisconsin-Madison posits specific long-term outcomes for children of single-parent households. Her studies reflect that a high percentage of single mothers never graduate from high school and that this increases the chances of their children not graduating from high school by 10 percent. Exposure to single parenthood as a child also raises the probability of next generation single parenthood by approximately 120 percent. McLanahan's research testifies that daughters of single parents are 30 to 53 percent more likely to marry as teenagers, 75 to 111 percent more likely to give birth while teenagers and are more likely to experience marital severance and have babies out of wedlock. These statistics may reflect the result of single-parenting disadvantages such as less supervisory methods utilized during adolescent years and reduced ability for effective disciplining. Importance of Homelife While much of the research conducted on single-parent and dual-parent households points to the disadvantages of single-parent families, there is extreme relevance in emphasizing the value of a secure, consistent, loving homelife to a child's upbringing. Single parents and dual parents alike have the ability to create a homelife for their child that provides stability, emotional support and dependability. Further studies conducted by Dr. Paul Amato along with Frieda Fowler, Department of Sociology at University of Nebraska-Lincoln, demonstrate that positive parenting techniques -- regardless of family structure, income level or diversity -- directly correlate to a favorable outcome for a child's development and success later in life. Any parenting model, whether it's single parent, biological dual parent, stepparent or cross-generational has the capacity to incorporate positive parenting methods such as understanding developmental needs, talking and listening, modeling respect, encouragement and participation. The Effects of Parents Being Absent From the Hom - 9/20/17 Whether it’s Mom or Dad who is absent from the home, children without one or both of their parents at home with them suffer. Some feel the effects tremendously and others less so, but many children suffer in life due to the absence of a parent. In a perfect world, all children would life in happy homes with two loving, doting parents who are comfortable both financially and emotionally. However, reality is much different than fantasy, which means not all children have the same home life and opportunities as others. Behavioral Effects of Absent Parents According to Edward Kruk, Ph.D. and associate professor of social work at the University of British Columbia, children with absent fathers are more likely to develop behavioral problems. These problems are often a shield that kids use to protect their deep issues of abandonment, fear and unhappiness. For example, a child living in a fatherless home is more likely to develop a careless attitude with a cocky swagger and mean persona to hide the fact that he really wants his father in his life. Poverty and Absent Parents Children who live with one parent are four times more likely to live in poverty than children in two-parent homes, according to a March 2011 survey performed by the U.S. Census Bureau. This information is more accurate when considering one parent homes that consist of a mother and her children, rather than a father and his children. This is largely due to the fact that in many cases, the father is the breadwinner and supporter of the family, although this is not indicative of all single-mother or single-father households. According to this survey, two-parent families account for only 12 percent of the poverty-stricken population, while single-mother families account for 44 percent of the poverty-stricken population. Effects of Growing Up Too Fast According to an article written by Geoffrey L. Greif, an assistant professor at the School of Social Work and Community Planning at the University of Maryland, many girls who grow up in a single-father home grow up too quickly. Since moms are typically the parents who take on the primary role of caregiving and housework, it is not unusual for daughters to take on this role in the single-father household, which often causes them to grow up too quickly. This leaves less time for them to focus on school work and fun, friends and socializing, and it sometimes leads to resentment and stress. One of the biggest effects an absent parent -- particularly an absent father -- has on children is abuse 2 This is a verified and trusted source. Psychology Today: Father Absence, Father Deficit, Father Hunger Goto Source According to Edward Kruk, Ph.D., children living with their single mother are far more likely to suffer abuse of some sort, be it emotional, physical or even sexual abuse. This type of abuse could come at the hands of single mothers, their boyfriends or current husbands, caregivers or other family members. It could be said that single mothers often have to work harder and longer hours than mothers of children living with two parents, and this leaves their children more exposed to abuse at the hands of others. However, there are dozens of reasons why children with only one parent are more likely to suffer abuse. The Role of Daughters in the Latino Culture - 9/26/17 The role of daughters in the family is very important in the Latino culture. Latina daughters are expected to learn the domestic tasks of their mothers, grandmothers and aunts. They are also expected to adhere to a stringent system of traditional values reflective of their culture. While there is typically a great deal of pressure on the Latina daughter, she will likely have the love and support of her family as the family unit is top priority in the Latino community. Obedience In the Latino culture, there is a high expectation for obedience placed upon daughters. According to the "Journal of Family Psychology," Latin families in general have a deep sense of respect for their elders 1 This is a verified and trusted source. Journal of Family Psychology: The Role of Respect in Latin Families This respect is demanded more so from daughters, as sons are given more leeway in their behavior. Latin daughters are raised with the belief that arguing with parents is considered disrespectful and completely unacceptable. Meanwhile, Latin sons are given more freedom to choose what they want to do and when. Moral Compass The "Marriage and Family Encyclopedia" discusses the role of the Latin daughter as far as modesty is concerned 2 This is a verified and trusted source. Marriage and Family Encyclopedia: Hispanic-American Families-Latino Family Roles. The article, "Hispanic-American Families, Latin Family Roles," cites a term used in Latin culture -- "marianismo" -- which means to "be like Mary," as in the Virgin Mary 1 This is a verified and trusted source. Journal of Family Psychology: The Role of Respect in Latin Families. This is a verified and trusted source. Marriage and Family Encyclopedia: Hispanic-American Families-Latino Family Roles. While sons are expected to have "machismo," which means "macho," daughters are expected to be chaste and virginal.. Caretaker. The article "Gender Socialization in Latino/a Families" says that Latin daughters do not typically leave home until they get married 3 This is a verified and trusted source. Digital Commons University of Nebraska-Lincoln: Gender Socialization in Latin Families Traditionally, daughters live with their parents until they are ready to begin their own family. It is the role of the Latin daughter to play caretaker to her parents, then her own family. The family is the top priority to Latin people, and the females in the family are the ones who are raised to keep that priority going strong. In contrast, Latin males may move out and live with friends or other male family members. Domesticity In Latin families, tradition dictates women take care of domestic tasks. According to, "Hispanic-American Families, Latino Family Roles," daughters are taught to cook, clean and manage a household 2? Marriage and Family Encyclopedia: Hispanic-American Families-Latino Family Roles Often in a Latin household, the elders come to live with the family once they cannot live on their own, and it is the elders who help mold daughters into proper Latin women. Grandmothers, mothers and aunts all work together to teach daughters the proper homemaking ways so she can successfully run her household someday. This is how Latin daughters help their families and exhibit respect for their elders. Do Twins Have a Closer Relationship Than Other Siblings? - 9/26/17 Fraternal and, especially, identical twins are famous for sharing close relationships. Are those relationships closer than those of other siblings? It’s a relevant question when the number of twins being born in the U.S. has increased dramatically due to the widespread use of fertility drugs -- 3.2 out of 100 births result in multiple babies. Debbie Ganz, who co-wrote a book on twins with her twin sister Lisa, says, “It’s not a normal relationship.” The personal accounts of twins show that their relationship can be much deeper and more idiosyncratic than those of siblings who don’t share the exact same birth date and time. “Twinergy Synergy” Identical twins and tennis doubles champions Mike and Bob Bryan call their high level of connection “twinergy synergy," while their coach calls it “the twin ESP thing.” Twins like the Bryans often know each other so well that they seem to communicate telepathically, while other tennis doubles teams take more time to hash out their strategies verbally. A study done by Alan Mikkelson of Whitworth University states that while identical twins share 100 percent DNA similarity or relatedness, fraternal twins and full siblings share about 50 percent DNA similarity. This means that identical twins are more alike not just in looks, but in psychological makeup and personality, and thus actually have more “synergy” than most other siblings. Mutual Support Identical twins are likely to give each other the most social support of any siblings, closely followed by fraternal twins and full siblings. Mikkelson’s study concluded that there is a high correlation between genetic relatedness and social support, because siblings who have more in common tend to like the same things, and therefore spend more time with one another in a supportive relationship. The siblings with the most in common are usually identical twins. Other siblings may have interests in common and develop a close relationship, but the relationships of identical twins will almost always be closer than relationships between other siblings due to the similarity in their genetic makeup. Age Differences Age differences between siblings can also affect their level of closeness. Since most twins are born just seconds or minutes apart, they have almost no age difference between them and often go through life perceived by others and themselves as a set of two people rather than just one person. Siblings who are close in age tend to have more in common with each other and remain more socially supportive of each other than siblings who have a wide age gap between them. This may be because siblings who are close in age grow up at relatively the same pace, go through school together and might participate in similar activities. Adult Twins Society tends to expect of twins that they behave as an inseparable duo in childhood, but then grow up to become separate, individual people. According to Mike and Bob Bryan, this isn’t always the case. The adult twins still share a uniquely close relationship, spend the majority of their time with each other and even dress alike both on and off the court. It makes dating difficult, one ex-girlfriend said, because: they already have what you might call a “soul mate.” The twins say that they want to date, that ideally their girlfriends would be best friends with each other but they realize that’s a tall order Even in adulthood, then, twin relationships can be much closer than other sibling relationships 1 This is a verified and trusted source Journal of Family Communication: Differential Solicitude of Social Support in Different Types of Adult Sibling Relationships What Do You Call an Adopted Brother? When someone asks how you came to have a new brother, it is perfectly acceptable to tell the person your family has just adopted a new brother. Once a child is adopted, he is legally your full brother. He is not a stepbrother, half-brother or foster brother. Constantly reminding your new brother of his adopted status or implying that he is less than your full brother can be emotionally damaging to your brother. Ensuring that your whole family is on board before a child is adopted should avoid any misunderstanding about your new brother's status in the family 1 This is a verified and trusted source. New York State Office of Family and Social Services: White Paper on Keeping Siblings Connected Your Real Brother All children are real and your adopted brother is a real brother. Families parent children through birth, adoption, step-parenting, foster care, kinship care, guardianship and mutual agreement. Differentiating between your biological siblings and other siblings can cause lower self-esteem and emotional problems. If you are asked whether he is your real brother, you should answer yes. Unless you are being asked to donate an organ or bone marrow, further explanation is not necessary. If your parent marries a person who already has a son, you become stepbrothers. Your parent’s new spouse is your step-parent. If your parent has a male child with your new step-parent, that boy will be your half-brother. While these are the legal terms for your relationships, people rarely use them in introductions. It is more common and acceptable to just introduce the boy as your brother. Foster Brother or Guardianship If your parents provide foster care for unrelated male children, they are your foster brothers. If your parents have guardianship of an unrelated boy child, you technically have no legal relationship with the boy. However, in both of those scenarios, your emotional attachment might cause you to think of the boy as a brother. This is especially true if the boy lives with your family for years. It is perfectly acceptable to refer to the boy as your brother. Name Changing Adoptive parents might struggle with deciding whether to keep the name that the birth parents gave to their new son. When adopting an older child, you need to first discuss a name change with the child. A new, unexpected name could be shocking and result in identity and self-esteem issues. Choosing the name in infant adoption is typical, but if you made promises to birth parents regarding names you, should honor those. Some older adoptees feel that a new name gives them a fresh start with their new. This is a verified and trusted source. New York State Office of Family and Social Services: White Paper on Keeping Siblings Connected. Name changing is a very personal decision for each family to make together. The Responsibilities of a Stepmother - 9/26/17 Blame Disney -- the portrayal of the wicked stepmother makes it hard for blended families everywhere. While the real truth behind stepping into the role of a stepmother is different for each family, carving out your own place in your new relationship can be fraught with conflict. By knowing your responsibilities, you can create new relationships with your stepchildren without stepping on any toes, therefore kicking the stepmother stereotype to the curb. Defining Your Role One mistake that stepmothers sometimes make is trying to assume someone else's role, which can breed contempt among kids, warns the Ohio State University Cooperative Extension 1 This is a verified and trusted source. Ohio State University Cooperative Extension: The Stepmother’s Role in a Blended Family Rather than trying to step into their biological mother's shoes, your responsibility is to create a new role for yourself. While you may have mothering responsibilities, you are not your stepkids' biological mother. By cultivating individual relationships with your stepchildren, you can define your role as stepmother, rather than surrogate mom. Supporting Biological Parents While it may be hard to separate personal feelings from your working relationship, it's your responsibility to support both of your stepkids' biological parents. As a stepmother, you should remain a neutral party to the children, even if you dislike the biological mother. Avoid undermining either of the biological parents and always ask before doing something that would traditionally be their responsibility, like helping out in a stepchild's class at school, suggests Divorce Magazine 2 This is a verified and trusted source. Divorce Magazine: Stepfamily Roles Enforcing Discipline It's not your job to decide on rules and their consequences -- that's left up to the biological parents unless both ask you to step in. Instead, you can discipline in form of enforcement. Rather than initiating your stepkids consequences when they're out of line, it's your responsibility to relay and enforce what the biological parents have stipulated. Still, it's also your responsibility to make sure your stepkids respect you, notes DrPhil.com. Enforcing existing discipline rules is a way to keep them in line without actually initiating the punishment. As a stepmother, you can either be the force that drives a family apart, or the person who keeps them together. By building relationships between you and your spouse, you and your stepchildren and even their biological mother, you solidify your role as someone who cares about the emotional climate of the entire family. By getting to know your stepchildren better, paying attention and even cultivating a healthy working relationship with your spouse's ex, you fulfill your core responsibility as one of the heads of household in a blended family. Marriage Problems Caused by Stepchildre - 4/18/17 The U.S. Census Bureau reports that 50 percent of all marriages end in divorce, 75 percent of divorced couples remarry and 66 percent of cohabitating or remarried couples break up when children are involved. These numbers clearly reflect the challenge of blending a family through remarriage. The process of adjusting to a new family dynamic is difficult for everyone involved and can result in problems within the marriage. Disrespect of Authority Children whose parents have divorced are more likely to display aggressive behavior, difficulty interacting with parents, siblings and peers and problems with authority than children whose biological parents remain married. Subsequent remarriage can cause a child to feel a number of negative emotions, including resentment, jealousy, disappointment and guilt.These emotions can manifest in outright disobedience and disrespect toward the step-parent, who often gets the blame for the child’s unwanted situation. Bad feelings can occur within the marriage when the spouse tolerates or defends the child’s behavior, leaving the step-parent feeling like an unwanted intruder in his own home. Children should be encouraged to express their emotions openly while maintaining a standard of respect for everyone in the household. Differences in Discipline In any marriage, differences in child rearing and discipline styles can cause conflict. When the children in question are stepchildren, the potential for conflict increases. Parenting roles are not as clear-cut in a step-parent and stepchild relationship. A step-parent who comes on too strong in an authoritative role can alienate the children and trigger protective instincts and defensiveness in the biological parent. This can lead to conflict within the marriage and a family divided. Parenting roles and boundaries should be decided as a couple. As conflicts arise, it is vital for both parents to present a united front to the children and resolve any differences in private. Jealousy A step-parent is a member of a team of parents, including the other biological parent, aka the ex-spouse. It is in the best interests of the children for both biological parents to remain actively involved in their life. However, the presence of the ex-spouse can spark insecurity and jealousy in the current spouse, as well as the potential for conflict over the care or discipline of the children. Effective co-parenting requires communication and coordination between both homes. Parents divorce each other, not the children, and a step-parent can take comfort in knowing that the ex-spouse is the “ex” for a reason 2 This is a verified and trusted source. AtHealth.com: Divorce and Children: An Interview with Robert Hughes Jr., Ph.D. Couple Time A common complaint among married couples with children is a lack of adult time. The problem is compounded when children from previous marriages are combined in one household. The responsibilities of keeping a home and caring for children are endless and often leave little opportunity for quality time with a spouse. Communication problems and emotional distance can develop when couples do not make a concentrated effort to spend time together away from the everyday stresses of family life. Marriage is the foundation of family and taking time to strengthen that relationship benefits the entire family. How to Deal With Teenage Girls and Step Fathers - 4/18/17 Raising a teenager daughter as single mother is difficult especially if you remarry and introduce a new step father into her life. Children often rebel against step parents and teen age daughters may chafe against a step father, especially if he is introduced to her when she is already in her teen years. Dealing with integrating your new husband happily into your teenage daughter's life will be a difficult process that takes coordination between you and your husband. Discuss changes in parenting you want to make with your husband before you are married. Integrate this into your teenage daughter's life before you marry. Do this without explaining why these changes are occurring. This lessens the chance she will associate these changes with her step father, resenting him for them. Limit your expectations of how the step father and your daughter will interact 3 This is a verified and trusted source Australian Institute of Family Studies: Step Fathers and Children. Understand that he won’t take the place of her father. Don’t try to force either of them to expect that role or force them to interact. Understand that things will progress slowly. Let your daughter slowly accept her step father as the days, weeks and months pass. Be patient as it may take months before she is comfortable interacting with him. Be the disciplinarian in your family. Keep in mind that your daughter is more likely to respond to a biological parent. Avoid putting more stress on your daughter and her step father by keeping him out of discipline. Integrate your husband into the every day life of your household. Make sure he is doing chores and contributing to the house, including investing in the home, buying supplies, cleaning dishes and more. Create a predictable and organized schedule for your home, including events that integrate your daughter and husband, such as Sunday dinners or even a game night. Use these regular events to help create a familiarity and comfort between your husband and teen. Encourage your husband if he gets discouraged. Don’t let him withdraw from your daughter or get angry or resentful. Persistence can pay off and it may help her warm to him easier. Discuss any problems your teen may be having in a private and comfortable fashion. Don’t force her to talk if she is uncomfortable. Let her know you are open to discussion about her step father and take her complaints and problems seriously. Blended Family Advantages & Disadvantages - 4/18/17 Blending a family takes time, energy and commitment. When adults with children marry, they are often dismayed by unanticipated difficulties along the way. Despite the "everything’s rosy" reruns of television shows such as the Brady Bunch, blending lifestyles and children to create a new family has both advantages and disadvantages. More Members of the Family In a blended family that functions well, children have more relatives to support, teach and love them, according to “Excerpt from Home-School Relations: Working Successfully with Parents and Families” on the Education.com website 1 This is a verified and trusted source. Education.com: Facts and Myths about Blended Families The differing perspectives and experience of these new family members adds richness and diversity to the child’s life. Although this can have a number of benefits for both child and relative, it can also result in conflict due to differing viewpoints. The child might feel pulled in multiple directions, feel she can never please anyone or simply give up and become passive. Economic Matters A majority of single-parent families are headed by females, and it is not uncommon for the children to live in a more limited economic situation than their duel parent counterparts. When the mother remarries, economic conditions and standards of living often improve, if the total family income increases. Mom may have fewer economic worries and decreased stress, which allows her to spend more time focused on the children. However, when both parents bring children into the blended family, there may also be more need to share toys, clothes or activities which creates more conflict. New Roles A blended family may be more stable, secure and loving, especially when children previously experienced domestic violence, neglect or child abuse. Family dynamics always change when a family blends, according to the HealthyChildren.org website 3. This is a verified and trusted source. HealthyChildren.org: Becoming a Stepfamily When a stepparent comes to live in the home a child previously shared with both biological parents, for example, it might seem to the child that the new parent is a guest in the home. Comments such as “You’re not my mother!” can arise when the stepparent attempts to exert authority. Learning to Flex Because of the changes inherent in successfully creating a blended family, both parents and children learn flexibility, according to Education.com 1.This is a verified and trusted source. Education.com: Facts and Myths about Blended Families Adults’ attitudes and behavior have a significant impact on the success of the new family, and children can learn a great deal about compromise, negotiation and conflict resolution. Children can develop coping skills, for example, as they learn to adapt to change. These skills can be beneficial throughout their lives. However, if blended family stresses are significant or major difficulties arise, parents should seek help from experts such as pediatricians or counselors to help everyone in the family make a good adjustment. An Absent Parent and Self-Esteem in Children - 9/26/17 Parents are not always there for their children. In some cases, a parent simply abandons the child entirely and is never seen again. In others, the parent may be absent involuntarily because of incarceration or due to a military deployment. Some parents die at a relatively young age. No matter what the cause, a child whose parent is absent suffers a number of negative effects, among which can be a lowered sense of self-esteem. Self-Esteem Self-esteem is related to the way children think of and value themselves, according to child development experts at the Kids Health website. Children with high self-esteem tend to be realistic, feel good about themselves and are better able to handle conflicts and resist pressures. Children with low self-esteem, on the other hand, often struggle with challenges and may have a hard time finding solutions when they experience problems. They are more likely to be self-critical or to become passive, withdrawn or depressed. Healthy self-esteem involves feeling both capable and loved 1 This is a verified and trusted source. KidsHealth: Developing Your Child's Self-Esteem Absent Fathers In one study on rural southern adolescents reported in the November/December 2005 Association of Black Nursing Faculty Journal, researchers examined a cohort of 1,409 adolescents 2. This is a verified and trusted source.Association of Black Nursing Faculty Journal: The Influence of Father Absence on the Self-Esteem and Self-Reported Sexual Activity of Rural Southern Adolescents Goto Source .Children in homes where a father was not present were more likely to engage in increased sexual activity and to have lower self-esteem. There was no relationship between self-esteem and sexual activity, however. In a May 2012 article for Psychology Today, Edward Kruk, author of “Co-Parenting After Divorce,” expresses concerns that fathers' contributions to children are consistently devalued by social institutions, leading to homes in which the mother is the primary parent. Kruk reports that children in homes where fathers are not involved in their lives experience diminished self-esteem, behavioral problems, truancy, poor academic performance, delinquency and homelessness, as well as teen pregnancy. Military Deployment Military families regularly face the issue of deployment. In some cases, a deployment means a parent will be gone for a period of time, but in others, it means the parent is going to war. Although parents who are deployed usually try to develop strategies to stay in touch, they are still not there for important moments such as the loss of the first tooth, special holidays or a child’s birthday. Children whose parents are deployed may experience a number of problems, according to Kids Health professionals, although loss of self-esteem is not mentioned. Some -- especially infants and toddlers –may become withdrawn or clingy. Older children might experience sleep problems, nightmares and sadness. Absent Mothers Although much of the research on absent parents is focused on the absence of fathers, children also suffer from the absence of a mother. In a presentation for Caribbean Foster Care, clinical psychologist Judith Arndell notes that a mother can be physically present but emotionally absent, due to drug abuse or mental illness, or might have been divorced or abandoned the child. Arndell notes that abandonment by the mother causes trauma, depression and fears that the child may carry into adulthood. Abandonment also causes anger, insecurity, fear of rejection, impulsive behaviors, self-destructive behavior and poor self-esteem. Interesting Facts on Teen Love - 12/5/18 Partly emotional, partly biochemical, young love is an important part of adolescent development. Yet teen relationships often look far different than adult relationships. Teen daters are simultaneously coping with a rush of hormones, the search for a personal identity, and changing expectations in all aspects of their lives. These factors, coupled with a lack of the life experience needed to put relationships into perspective, create romances that appear to teeter between obsession and rejection. Teen and Young Adult Psychosocial Development According to developmental theorist Erik Erikson, the central crisis for the teen years is the search for a personal identity. In young adulthood, the crisis shifts to the search for a fulfilling intimate relationship. Erikson speculated that true intimacy requires both partners to have a solid sense of self and to be willing to merge their individual identities for the good of the partnership. In an article for “Psychology Today,” psychologist Carl Pickhardt suggests that teen crushes are based largely on elaborate fantasies that the admirer projects onto the object of admiration 1 This is a verified and trusted source. Psychology Today: “Adolescence and the Teenage Crush.” Carl Pickhardt, PhD. This is a verified and trusted source. Psychology Today: Teenagers in Love. The crush, and ultimately the relationship, is more a reflection of the partners’ individual goals and desires. The Three C’s Love can ultimately be broken down into three components, sometimes known as the three C’s, according to a 2012 article at PsychologyToday.com. Chemistry is the initial rush of attraction. It is largely biochemical and accounts for the butterflies and nervous behavior around the object of affection. Closeness is the bond of trust that allows partners to share secrets and feel secure in each other’s support. Commitment occurs when two people decide to stick together even when the relationship gets tough. Chemistry is inevitable during the teen years, but closeness and commitment are more advanced skills. When discussing true intimacy, some experts replace chemistry with communication, arguably a more important trait for lifetime relationships. Practice Relationships or Real Love? Some experts believe that teens are capable of developing lasting love relationships. For “Teenagers in Love,” researcher Nancy Kalish studied first loves in historical and modern eras 4. This is a verified and trusted source. Psychology Today: Teenagers in Love She points out that through World War II, most teenagers got married shortly after high school. Since then, the average age of first marriage has climbed while the average age of puberty has dropped. Today’s teens see dating as more about having fun than choosing a life partner, but it is not uncommon for people to miss their first love. Some spend their entire lives wondering what could have been. In a study of 1,600 adults ages 18 through 92, a quarter would happily return to their first love. Teen relationships might be different than adult relationships, but they are not necessarily any less real. Teen Dating Violence According to StayTeen.org, roughly one in four teens have been genuinely afraid of physical abuse from a partner 5. This is a verified and trusted source. StayTeen.org: Dating Abuse The same percentage felt that a partner had pressured them to avoid spending time with friends or family, and nearly as many had felt pressure to perform sexually. Teen dating abuse takes many forms, from subtle pressure to physical attacks 5. This is a verified and trusted source Many teens lack the experience to accurately judge whether a partner’s behavior is abusive, especially in more subtle cases. Keep the lines of communication open and encourage your teen to tell you if anything about her relationship feels uncomfortable. Breaking Up Although some teen relationships last a lifetime, the majority come to a sudden or gradual end. Some couples break up when they head off to college, others simply realize that they have little in common. Whatever the reason, teen reactions to breakups tend to be passionate. Your teenager might be overwhelmed with grief. She might blame herself. Some teens even develop suicidal thoughts. Many adults react in an offhand way, making heartbroken teens feel belittled. Reassure your child that her feelings are normal, and encourage her to talk through them. If your teen’s grief affects her life, or she shows signs of suicidal thoughts, enlist the help of a qualified mental health worker. How a Newborn Affects Family Dynamics - 9/26/17 The birth of a new baby brings excitement as you welcome a new member to your family. A birth can be so momentous that it affects the dynamics of the entire family, creating new shifts in the way loved ones interact with each other. When you anticipate these changes, you can be better equipped to ride out the adjustments. Couple to Parents When the birth of a baby transforms you from a couple to parents, the transition can be significant and challenging. Sharing in the birth of your baby often heightens a connection between partners. There may be difficulties ahead, however, as you navigate your way through parenting. With the newborn’s arrival, one or both of you may begin to experience significant sleep deprivation, which can make getting along difficult, warns social worker Margarita Tartakovsky, writing for the PsychCentral website. Some reorganization of family responsibilities is also likely to follow a baby’s arrival, which might take some discussion. It’s also possible that the logistics of caring for a newborn will put a damper on intimacy, at least for a while. Difficult Newborn Behavior A newborn might exhibit difficult behavior, which can challenge the entire family. Fussy newborns who cry often can be disrupting to the dynamics of the family, state authors of “Infantile Colic,” published by the American Family Physician 2.This is a verified and trusted source. American Family Physician: Infantile Colic Parents may become anxious, frustrated and fearful about parenting skills, which can have a negative effect on communication between them and the way the family functions as a whole. Excessive fatigue associated with the crying can make interactions even more difficult. Older Children Introducing the newborn into the family will also affect his siblings. The impact of the newborn depends on the older child’s age, according to the American Academy of Pediatrics' HealthyChildren.org website. A toddler won’t have the maturity to understand much why mom and dad seem tired and busier than usual, which may contribute to clinginess. Preschool children, desiring attention, might regress to babyish behaviors. Older children understand the transition involved in the birth of a baby, but they still need special attention and encouragement from parents. Extended Family Extended family members might also react to the birth of a newborn due to a shift in family dynamics. With the arrival of the baby, parents tend to focus inward to care for the baby and other children during the initial adjustment period. This change in focus may cause extended family to feel left out and ignored, according to the Associated Relationship & Marriage Counselors website 4. This is a verified and trusted source Associated Relationship & Marriage Counsellors: Your Relationship & A New Baby Emotions involved could include anger,
resentment and sadness. These relatives, as well as friends,
might also need a little reassurance. Fathers Raising
Motherless Children: Widowed Men Give Voice to Their Lived
Experiences - 2/17 23 Seven studies collected data directly from children, [23][24][25][26][27][28][29] three collected data from children and parents, [30][31][32] and the remaining five collected data from parents only. [33][34][35][36][37] Sample size ranged from 4 to 39 participants per study, with 210 child participants Systematic review aged 6-18 years (female=80, male=56, gender not stated=74) and 57 parents included. Not all studies reported the number of parent participants. ... ... Adjusting as a surviving parent Review findings showed that parents lost their 'normal' lives, family dynamics changes and they were forced into life as single parents. [32][33][34][35][36][37] Parents felt heavy demands on their time and mental resources, struggling to share their time between their children, which often led to arguments and misunderstandings. 32 33 Other parents had too much time, leaving them feeling alone, frustrated and craving companionship. ... ... 33 34 36 Parents had sole responsibility for their children, which was often daunting and scary; parents felt alone, helpless and vulnerable, struggling to make decisions. [33][34][35][36][37] Parents worried about what was best for their children. Some questioned most decisions they made for fear of getting it wrong; some turned to extended family or others for advice. ... Parental death: a systematic review of support experiences and needs of children and parent survivors - 11/22 ... As described in an earlier article on the return to work of these bereaved individuals (Holmgren, 2021c), the majority had felt overburdened trying to juggle a full-time job and the responsibilities of being a widow or widower with grieving children. This is in line with earlier research on spousal loss in families with children in the home (e.g., McClatchey, 2018;Yopp, Park, Edwards, Deal, & Rosenstein, 2015). In the present 22 study, the death of a spouse had often happened at the same time as other challenging life events or even let to a cascade of changes (Holmgren, 2021c). ... ... Generally, the surviving parents expressed concerns for the well-being of their bereaved children. In alignment with previous studies on parentally bereaved families (McClatchey, 2018;Worden, 1996;Yopp et al., 2015), the surviving parents in the present study recounted that they had often found it necessary to put the needs of their grieving children first. Thus, for many adults, their own grief was of secondary importance, while they were trying to sort out help and support for their children. ... ... Furthermore, she stresses the necessity of educating professional support staff for them to be able to meet the needs of bereaved children (McClatchey, 2018). ... Social Support in Bereavement: The Experiences of Support Following Spousal Loss in Families with Dependent Children - 6/22 ... Research on families with children in the home, who lose a parent to death, has shown that this particular group of bereaved individuals might be especially vulnerable (Aamotsmo & Bugge 2013;Cerel et al., 2006;Haine et al., 2008;Werner-Lin & Biank, 2012. Adjusting to life as a sole parent and handling one's own grief at the same time as supporting grieving children place high demands on the surviving parent (Burgess, 1995;McClatchey, 2018;Saldinger et al., 2004;Werner-Lin & Biank, 2012Worden, 1996;Yopp et al., 2015). Studies suggest that this might be particularly challenging when the father is the surviving parent due to, for example, changes in family roles following the death (Boerner & Silverman, 2001) and differences in parenting style (Boerner & Silverman, 2001;Saldinger et al., 2004;Worden, 1996). ... ... Studies suggest that this might be particularly challenging when the father is the surviving parent due to, for example, changes in family roles following the death (Boerner & Silverman, 2001) and differences in parenting style (Boerner & Silverman, 2001;Saldinger et al., 2004;Worden, 1996). Despite of this, studies on widowed fathers with dependent children are scarce (McClatchey, 2018;Yopp et al., 2015Yopp et al., , 2019. The same applies for studies examining possible changes in relationships within these bereaved families seen from both an adult and a child perspective. ... ... might affect the way in which the individual handles his or her own griefor indeed, might result in the individual postponing dealing with own issues of grieving. When looking at studies on widowed parents with dependent children, the surviving parents quite often report high levels of distress (e.g., McClatchey, 2018;Yopp & Rosenstein, 2012;Yopp et al., 2015). In a follow-up study on widowed fathers, this was the case up until two years following the death of the mothers in the families (Yopp et al., 2019). ... Life in Parentally Bereaved Families: A mixed methods inquiry - 10/19 ... The death of a co-parent places high demands on the surviving parent. In addition to coping with his or her own grief, the surviving adult will have to adjust to life as a sole parent and support the grieving child or children at the same time (Burgess, 1995;McClatchey, 2018;Saldinger, Porterfield, & Cain, 2004;Werner-Lin & Biank, 2012-2013Worden, 1996;Yopp et al., 2015). Studies suggest that this might be especially challenging when the father is the surviving parent due to elements such as differences in parenting style (Boerner & Silverman, 2001;Saldinger et al., 2004;Worden, 1996) and the change in family roles following the death (Boerner & Silverman, 2001). ... ... Studies suggest that this might be especially challenging when the father is the surviving parent due to elements such as differences in parenting style (Boerner & Silverman, 2001;Saldinger et al., 2004;Worden, 1996) and the change in family roles following the death (Boerner & Silverman, 2001). Despite this fact, studies on widowed fathers with dependent-age children are scarce (McClatchey, 2018;Yopp & Rosenstein, 2012;Yopp et al., 2015). ... ... As anticipated, the men found it quite challenging supporting their grieving children and dealing with their own grief at the same time. The data bear witness to a group of bereaved individuals who were both struggling to come to terms with the untimely death of their spouses as well as putting the needs of their children first, a fact that has similarly been documented in previous studies on this population (McClatchey, 2018;Worden, 1996;Yopp et al., 2015). Although it was perceived as a necessity, the men in the present study expressed concerns that prioritizing in this way might come at a price, i.e. that their own grief might surface at a later point in time. ... Life Came to a Full Stop: The Experiences of Widowed Father - 10/19 ... The type of work itself might be a challenge in regards to working hours or duties which no longer fit with the new life circumstances of, for example, having sole responsibility for dependent children (Corden, 2016;Holmgren, 2019;McClatchey;. ... Returning to Work Following Spouses Loss? The Experiences of Widowed Parents - 1/21 ... They equally highlighted the special circumstances of being a widowed spouse with dependent children, who were also grieving the loss of a parent. In alignment with previous studies on parentally bereaved families (McClatchey, 2018;Worden, 1996;Yopp et al., 2015), the surviving parents recounted that they had often found it necessary to put the needs of their grieving children first. For that reason, many were sure they would have screened positive for PGD at 6 months, as they had very little time to process their own grief. ... Defining Normal: What Widowed Parents Make of Diagnosing Grief - 11/20 ... Despite varying levels of preparations for children when a parent is dying from cancer, families, particularly the bereaved parent, encounter new challenges when the ill-parent has just died (McClatchey, 2018). The bereaved parent, or other significant adult in the child's life, is then confronted with the highly emotive and challenging task of supporting the children at this distressing time of death (Sheehan et al., 2019) and the immediate bereavement period (i.e. the time from the death to the funeral) that follows. ... Immediate bereavement experiences when a parent of dependent children has died of cancer: Funeral directors' perspectives - 7/20 Parenting experiences of single fathers: A meta-synthesis - 10/22 Deceased-Focused Mourning in Loss of a Parent - 4/22 Facing the Ties That Bind: Understanding Experiences of Men With An Incarcerated Romantic Partne - 11/21 Widowed Young: The Role of Stressors and Protective Factors for Resilience in Coping with Spousal Loss - 9/21 Communication, self-esteem and prolonged grief in parent-adolescent dyads, 1–4 years following the death of a parent to cancer - 11/20 Motherless
families Effects of
Parents on Crime Rate The absence of the father is the single most important cause of crime.1) In fact, boys who are fatherless from birth are three times as likely to go to jail as peers from intact families, while boys whose fathers do not leave until they are 10 to 14 years old are two times as likely to go to jail as their peers from intact families.2) According to Robert Rector of the Heritage Foundation, children without a father are more than twice as likely to be arrested for a juvenile crime and are three times more likely to go to jail by the time they reach age 30 than are children raised in intact families.3) Adolescents who had a positive relationship with their fathers are less likely to be arrested, belong to a gang, damage property, steal, or run away compared to their peers with less positive relationships with their fathers.4) Along with the increased probability of family poverty and heightened risk of delinquency, a father's absence is associated with a host of other social problems. The three most prominent effects are lower intellectual development, higher levels of illegitimate parenting in the teenage years, and higher levels of welfare dependency.5) According to a 1990 report from the Department of Justice, more often than not, missing and “throwaway” children come from single-parent families, families with step parents, and cohabiting-adult families. 2. Role of Mothers The early experience of intense maternal affection is the basis for the development of a conscience and moral compassion for others.6) According to Chuck Smith, a Kansas State University child development expert, “as a child grows and matures, the mother—whether biological or a stepmother—plays an important role in her child's development, character and attitudes.”7) If a child's emotional attachment to their mother is disrupted during the first few years, permanent harm can be done to the child's capacity for emotional attachment to others. The child will be less able to trust others and throughout his or her life will stay more distant emotionally from others. Having many different caretakers during the first few years can lead to a loss of this sense of attachment for life and to antisocial behavior.8) Separation from the mother, especially between six months and three years of age, can lead to long-lasting negative effects on behavior and emotional development. Severe maternal deprivation is a critical ingredient of juvenile delinquency. As John Bowlby, the father of attachment research, puts it, “Theft, like rheumatic fever, is a disease of childhood, and, as in rheumatic fever, attacks in later life are frequently in the nature of recurrences.”9) A child's emotional attachment to their mother is powerful in other ways. For example, even after a period of juvenile delinquency, a young man's ability to become emotionally attached to his wife can make it possible for him to turn away from crime.10) This capacity is rooted in the very early attachment to his mother. We also know that a weak marital attachment resulting in separation or divorce accompanies a continuing life of crime.11) Many family conditions can weaken a mother's attachment to her young child. Perhaps the mother herself struggles with emotional detachment.12) The mother could be so lacking in family and emotional support that she cannot fill the emotional needs of the child. She could return to work, or be forced to return to work, too soon after the birth of her child. Or, while she is at work, there could be a change in the personnel responsible for the child's day care. The more prevalent these conditions, the less likely a child will be securely attached to their mother and the more likely they will be hostile and aggressive.13) 3. Effects of Parental Fighting The empirical evidence shows that, for a growing child, the happiest, safest, and most tranquil family situation is the intact primary marriage.14) But even within intact two-parent families, serious parental conflict has bad effects. The famous studies of Harvard professors Sheldon and Eleanor Glueck in the 1950s found that one-third of delinquent boys in their sample came from homes with spouse abuse. The Cambridge-Somerville Youth Study observed that the incidence of delinquent behavior was higher in intact homes characterized by a high degree of conflict and neglect than it was in broken homes without conflict.15) As this and other studies have shown, the lack of emotional attachment to parents is more strongly related to delinquency than is an intact home.16) Professor Kevin N. Wright, in his review of the literature for the Department of Justice, lists 21 other major studies that clearly show the link between parental conflict and delinquency.17) The lesson is clear: conflict between parents hurts the child. The more frequent or intense the conflict, the more the child is hurt emotionally. Violence within families not only increases the likelihood that children in those families will engage in disruptive behaviors but also that they will reflect that abuse on their spouse and children when they are older.18) 4. Effects of Parental Breakup In 2008, there were over 8 million divorced adults in the United States.19) Breakup of a child's parents' marriage during the first five years of their life places a child at high risk of becoming a juvenile delinquent.20) This breakup – through either divorce or separation – is most likely to occur three to four years after marriage. Therefore, a large proportion of very young children experience the emotional pain of the early and final stages of marital dissolution at a time when they are most vulnerable to disruptions in their emotional attachment to their parents.21) This instability continues to impact adolescents as they mature. Teens in blended or divorced families tend to have more behavioral problems, like using tobacco, binge drinking, weapon carrying, physical fighting, or sexual activity.22) Conflict within “step families” (families where at least one of the married parents is not the biological parent of all the children) also has serious effects. According to the California Youth Authority study of female delinquents, conducted by Jill Leslie Rosenbaum, professor of criminology at California State University, “In the two parent families examined in this study a great deal of conflict was present. Of these parents, 71 percent fought regularly about the children. Since there were often 'his', 'hers' and 'theirs' present, the sources of conflict tended to result from one set of children having a bad influence on the others, the type of punishment invoked, or one particular child receiving too much attention.”23) Rates of conflict are much higher outside intact married families.24) The rates of emotional and behavioral problems of children are more than double in step families.25) Given their impact on children, the marriage arrangements of parents have significant effects on the incidence of teenage crime. 5. Influence of Criminal Parents (See Effects of Criminal Parents on Children) Violent youth often come from violent parents. In 2007, over 1.5 million children had a father in prison, and over 147,000 children had a mother in prison.26) Violent youth are the most likely to have witnessed conflict and violence between their parents.27) They also are the most likely to commit a serious violent crime and to become “versatile” criminals – those engaged in a variety of crimes, including, theft, fraud, and drugs.28) Among these youths, physically or sexually abused boys commit the most violent offenses.29) Internal family violence is only one major contributor to adolescent violence in these socially disorganized neighborhoods. The neighborhood itself (which includes the youth's violent peers, also rooted in their own broken families) is the other powerful contributor,30) especially to violent delinquency,31) and its culture of aggression and violence is imported into the school. 6. Quality of Parenting As a child's emotional attachment to his parents ensures a well- adjusted adult,32) so parental rejection of the child has powerful opposite effects. Ronald Simons, professor of sociology at Iowa State University, summarizes the research findings: “Rejected children tend to distrust and attribute malevolent motives to others, with the result being a defensive, if not aggressive, approach to peer interactions…. Such [rejecting] parents not only fail to model and reinforce prosocial behavior, they actually provide training in aggressive noncompliant behavior.”33) Rejection by the family, which is the child's first and fundamental “community,” sets the stage for another social tragedy. Rejected children tend gradually to drop out of normal community life. Professor Simons continues: “Parental rejection… increased the probability of a youth's involvement in a deviant peer group, reliance upon an avoidant coping style, and use of substances.”34) Many other studies in the professional literature replicate these findings.35) Bonding between children and parents is critical to helping protect against youth violence.36) 1) Kevin N. Wright and Karen E. Wright, “Family Life and Delinquency and Crime: A Policymaker’s Guide to the Literature,” prepared under interagency agreement between the Office of Juvenile Justice and Delinquency Prevention and the Bureau of Justice Assistance of the U.S. Department of Justice, 1992. See reference to Ann Goetting, “Patterns of Homicide Among Children,” Criminal Justice and Behavior 35, no. 1 (1989): 31-44. 2) Cynthia C. Harper and Sara S. McLanahan, “Father Absence and Youth Incarceration,” Journal of Research on Adolescence 14, (2004): 369-397. 3) Robert Rector, “Marriage: America’s Greatest Weapon Against Child Poverty,” The Heritage Foundation (September 16, 2010). Available at www.heritage.org/research/reports/2010/09/marriage-america-s-greatest-weapon-against-child-poverty Accessed July 7, 2015. 4) Jacinta Bronte-Tinkew and Kristin A. Moore, “The Father-Child Relationship, Parenting Styles, and Adolescent Risk Behaviors in Intact Families,” Journal of Family Issues 27, no. 6 (June 2006): 850-881. 5) For a more comprehensive overview of the professional literature on the relationship between illegitimacy and these negative social phenomena, see Fagan, “Rising Illegitimacy, America’s Social Catastrophe.” 6) Jay Belsky “The Effects of Infant Day Care Reconsidered,” Early Childhood Research Quarterly 3, (1988): 235-272. On the vital connection between family and moral capacity, Wright and Wright, “Family Life and Delinquency and Crime,” summarizes the findings of the professional literature as follows: “Ainsworth suggested that children seek and accept the parent’s guidance, further maintaining that secure children obey voluntarily from their own desire rather than from fear of reprisal.” “Arbuthnot et al. in an attempt to understand moral development and family relationships, suggested that dysfunctional families experiencing high levels of conflict, dominance, hostility, lack of warmth, and authoritarian disciplinary styles do not allow children to gain insight and understanding into how their misbehaving might cause hurt to others. Under these negative family conditions, children cannot develop conventional moral reasoning with roots in acceptance of mutual expectations, positive social intentions, belief in and maintenance of the social system and acceptance of motives which includes duties and respect. Based on their review of the literature, Arbuthnot concluded that nearly all studies utilizing moral assessment devices with acceptable psychometric properties have shown that delinquents.“ “They argue that delinquency can be anticipated when children or adolescents are unable to see the perspective of others and lack empathy for other people’s circumstances. When conformity to rules of behavior for the sake of order in society is not accepted, when property is only valued in its possession, when personal relationships, even life itself are valued only for their utility, then delinquency behavior should not be a surprise. Moral or normative development at a more advanced level may be necessary for young people to move beyond utility to moral justification for correct behavior. The young persons must develop a sense of moral justification to have the ability and commitment to act accordingly when faced with temptation, economic deprivation or intense peer group pressure.” 7) Charles Smith, “A Powerful Connection: Mother-Child Bond Plays Role in Child’s Growth, Development,” Kansas State University (May 6, 2011). Available at www.k-state.edu/media/newsreleases/may11/motherchild50611.html. Accessed June 22, 2001. 8) R.J. Cadoret and C. Cain, “Sex Differences in Predictors of Antisocial Behavior in Adoptees,” Archives of General Psychiatry 37, (1980): 1171-1175. 9) Robert Karen, Becoming Attached (New York: Time Warner Books, 1994), chapter 4. 10) Robert J. Sampson and John L. Laub, “Crime and Deviance Over the Life Course: The Salience of Adult Social Bonds,” American Sociological Quarterly 5, (1990): 609-627. Larry Siegel and Brandon Welsh, Juvenile Delinquency: Theory, Practice, and Law, (Stamford: Cengage Learning 2014), 217. 11) David P. Farrington, “Later Adult Life Outcomes of Offenders and Nonoffenders,” in Children at Risk: Assessment, Longitudinal Research and Intervention, ed. Michael Brambring et al. (New York: Walter de Gruyter, 1989), 220-244, cited in Wright and Wright, “Family Life and Delinquency and Crime: A Policymaker’s Guide to the Literature.” 12) Robert Karen, Becoming Attached. The research for the following statements is reviewed in this book, which is the most comprehensive and interestingly written overview of the attachment literature to date. 13) Le Grande Gardner and Donald J. Shoemaker, “Social Bonding and Delinquency: A Comparative Analysis,” The Sociological Quarterly 30, no. 3 (1989): 481-500. 14) A primary marriage is one in which both husband and wife are in their first marriage. Melinda Yexley, Iris Borowsky and Marjorie Ireland, “Correlation Between Different Experiences of Intrafamilial Physical Violence and Violent Adolescent Behavior,” Journal of Interpersonal Violence 17, (2002): 707-720. 15) Cited in Van Voorhis et al. “The Impact of Family Structure and Quality on Delinquency: A Comparative Assessment of Structural and Functional Factors.” 16) Travis Hirschi, Causes of Delinquency (Berkley: University of California Press, 1969). 17) Wright and Wright, “Family Life and Delinquency and Crime: A Policymaker’s Guide to the Literature,” 11. 18) Richard E. Heyman and Amy M. Smith, “Do Child Abuse and Interparental Violence Lead to Adulthood Family Violence?” Journal of Marriage and Family 64, no. 4 (November 2002): 864-870. Alexandra Loukas, “Developmental Trajectories of Disruptive Behavior Problems Among Sons of Alcoholics: Effects of Parent Psychopathology, Family Conflict, and Child Undercontrol,” Journal of Abnormal Psychology 112, no. 1 (2003): 119-131. 19) US National Center for Health Statistics, Vital Statistics of the United States, and National Vital Statistics Report, Table 78. www.census.gov/compendia/statab/2012/tables/12s0078.pdf 20) Rolf Loeber, “Development and Risk Factors of Juvenile Antisocial Behavior and Delinquency,” Clinical Psychology Review 10, (1990): 1-41.; Rolf Loeber and Magda Stouthamer-Loeber, “Family Factors as Correlates and Predictors of Juvenile Conduct Problems and Delinquency,” in Crime and Justice: An Annual Review of Research, ed. M. Tonry and N. Morris (Chicago: University of Chicago Press, 1986) 7, 29-149. 21) David P. Farrington, “Later Adult Life Outcomes of Offenders and Nonoffenders,” in Children at Risk: Assessment, Longitudinal Research and Intervention, ed. Michael Brambring et al. (New York: Walter de Gruyter, 1989), 220-244 22) Kathleen B. Rodgers and Hillary A. Rose, “Risk and Resiliency Factors Among Adolescents Who Experience Marital Transitions,” Journal of Marriage and Family 64, no. 4 (November 2002): 1024-1037. 23) Jill L. Rosenbaum, “Family Dysfunction and Female Delinquency,” Crime and Delinquency 35, (1989): 31-44. 24) Carolyn Wolf Harlow, “Female Victims of Violent Crime” (Washington: U.S. Department of Justice, 1991). 25) Nicholas Zill and Charlotte A. Schoenborn, “Developmental Learning and Emotional Problems: Health of Our Nation’s Children, United States, 1988,” in Advance Data from the Vital and Health Statistics of the National Center for Health Statistics no. 190, (November 1990). “Stepfamilies in the United States: A Fact Sheet,” National Healthy Marriage Resource Center (February 2009). 26) Lauren Glaze and Laura Maruschak, Parents in Prison and Their Minor Children (Washington, D.C.: Bureau of Justice Statistics, 2008). 27) Candace Kruttschmitt, Linda Heath, and David A. Ward, “Family Violence, Television View Habits and Other Adolescent Experiences Related to Violent Criminal Behavior,” Criminology 24, (1986): 235-267. 28) Rolf Loeber, “Development and Risk Factors of Juvenile Antisocial Behavior and Delinquency,” Clinical Psychology Review 10, (1990): 1-41. 29) Cathy Spatz Widom, “Child Abuse, Neglect, and Violent Criminal Behavior,” Criminology 27, no. 2 (1989): 251-271; Dorothy Lewis et al. “Toward a Theory of the Genesis of Violence: A Follow-up Study of Delinquents,” Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry 28, no. 3 (1989): 431-436; Fagan and Wexler “Family Origins of Violent Delinquents”; DiLalla et al., “Aggression and Delinquency: Family and Environmental Factors.” 30) See “Stage Two, Community Experience Leading to Crime #3: The Growth of the Gang,” supra. 31) Elliott et al., The Dynamics of Deviant Behavior: A National Survey Progress Report. 32) For a full and interesting development of this point, see Robert Karen, Becoming Attached (New York: Time Warner Books, 1994). 33) Simons and Robertson, “The Impact of Parenting Factors, Deviant Peers, and Coping Style Upon Adolescent Drug Use,” See also Phyllis T. Howing, J.S. Wodarski, P.D. Kurtz, J.M. Gaudin, and E. Neligan Herbst, “Child Abuse and Delinquency: The Empirical and Theoretical Links,” Social Work (May 1990): 244-249, 245. 34) Ronald L. Simons and Joan F. Robertson, “The Impact of Parenting Factors, Deviant Peers, and Coping Style Upon Adolescent Drug Use,” Family Relations 38, (1989): 273-281. 35) See Ronald L. Simons et al., “The Nature of the Association Between Parental Rejection and Delinquent Behavior,” Journal of Youth and Adolescence 18, no. 3 (1989): 297-310. 36) Chris Knoester and Dana L. Haynie, “Community Context, Social Integration into Family, and Youth Violence,” Journal of Marriage and Family 67, no. 3 (August 2005): 767-780. This entry draws heavily from The Real Root Causes of Violent Crime: The Breakdown of Marriage, Family, and Community. Source: marripedia.org/effects_of_parents_on_crime_rates
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